Brokenness

I am a broken woman. There is probably nothing that brings that reality home more than running into an old acquaintance I hadn't seen in 15 years. As soon as the niceties were exchanged, she plunged headlong into a praise and worship service that would have rivalled any contemporary Christian service and shamed any spirit-filled preacher. I heard about her blessed marriage, perfect children, new ministry for the autumn years of her life, and what a marvellous and wonderful God she knew. For almost 20 minutes I stood speechless as she recounted the abundance of her blessings. I wondered what she would have thought if I had said, "I left my home and family with only the clothes on my back, went through a divorce, lost the respect of my children, family, and friends, shattered my dreams, and stand before you with only regrets and remorse." After she had finished talking I mumbled something like, "It was nice to see you again too," and with tears stinging my eyes I left the store where I had run into her.



I did what I sometimes do when I am feeling worthless and infinitesimally small, I wandered into the nearest Christian bookstore looking for answers. Maybe there was someone else out there who, like I had, worked so hard for so many years on their Christian walk yet failed so miserably also. But when I entered the store so many of the titles mocked me. Your Best Life Now! Find the Love of Your Life! I went to the bargain section with the rest of the rejects, and when I found the bargain clearance books I knew I was right at home. Tucked in a corner was a title that caught my eye, Rebuilding Your Broken World by Gordon MacDonald. I opened the book and read this sentence, "Almost everyone in the Bible had a broken-world experience. Virtually no one was exempt." Broken world experiences are not anomalies. I am not alone. I bought that bargain clearance book and carried it to my car clutched against my chest like a life preserver thrown to a drowning man. God is still good. I know He is in the business of rebuilding broken worlds. Maybe with Gordon MacDonald's help I'll find that my broken world can be rebuilt. We'll help each other here on this forum and encourage each other as we strive for peace and joy and restoration. The peace or our Lord Jesus be with you all.